Glenn's little ugly blog

I work for a company that develops direct mail campaigns for charities, among other things. I end up reading a whole bunch of examples of fundraising letters, and I see outside examples as well. Some are powerful and some are good.

I've found that the powerful letters are the ones that actually bring tears to my eyes. And very often it's one small section of the letter, a turn of phrase, a sentence that catches me. It's hard to explain – and I'm no good at really analyzing it.

Roger Craver posted on the Agitator today about an email he received. That email has one of those sections that caught me right in the chest. (The whole post and email are very much worth reading.)

And if you live near Philly and need your car washed, or your dog walked, or your plants watered while you're away... I'm there. And I can bring a gaggle of Youth Ministry kids to help with bigger jobs. If you visit Philadelphia and would like a home-cooked meal while you're in town, I'm your gal.

More importantly, however, you'll get a great deal of sincere gratitude from everyone involved, prayers of thanks and warm blessings on your behalf, and the knowledge that you helped another human being, one on one.

Bam. Right there in the second paragraph of this excerpt.

Last week a co-worker sent around a letter from a refugee to an Amnesty refugee coordinator, sharing the news that he successfully got asylum in Canada. Powerful stuff to begin with, but his email also had one of these moments:

In her conclusion the judge talked about so many things but the one, which touched me- She mentioned AI Canada, which gave me a support letter. I felt like she was saying that if AI Canada supported Mr. Mugisho, who am I to deny him.

I think there's something about really getting across not only the personal element of the story, but the power that Amnesty supporters have to change people's lives and make a real difference. All presented so simply.

The first example was written by a professional copywriter and the second was not, but they both have this moment of emotional power.

I've found that some poetry has this kind of effect sometimes, when it's really well written. When I'm browsing in the poetry section I often judge a book on whether a random selection has a moment when I feel a catch in my throat, the sudden presence of tears in my eyes.